The Eleanor Challenge
The Eleanor Challenge

Michael Kavanagh

25 Oct 2025

The Eleanor Challenge

On Sunday 26th January 2025, our 2 year old, Eleanor and her big sister Fiona, went to bed like any other night. We played, read stories, tucked them in and sang a lullaby. They both went to sleep happy and loved. The following morning, Monday 27th January, Di went into the girls’ room to discover the unthinkable had happened. Eleanor had passed away in her sleep. Having had no signs of a worrying illness, and the brightest, happiest, healthiest little girl we had absolutely no warning there was anything to be concerned about. The postmortem would come back some 12 weeks later showing she had viral pneumonia.

The pain of the reality of what happened is excruciating for us all. The pain we feel now reflects the love and memories we have of Eleanor and for the love and joy she brought to our family. We are incredibly grateful for the final memories we have with Eleanor. For Michael that memory is making Eleanor giggle at bedtime, for Di that memory is reading the girls a story with one child on each knee and watching them totter to bed next to each other.

Eleanor went to bed warm, loved, with happy memories of her parents and her beloved big sister. We are incredibly grateful for that. For Eleanor, that was the end of what was to her, the perfect life.

What followed was the most brutal period of our lives imaginable. Trying to ensure we do the absolute best for our 4-year-old Fiona, a move to a new part of the country away from our best friends, new jobs, alongside coping with the grief of losing our beloved daughter has been extraordinarily tough.

As I write this, the pain is still incredibly raw but it is fair to say that we do have joy back in our lives. Fiona is thriving and forces us to be silly and happy and undoubtedly lifts us daily. In Eleanor’s eulogy I pledged to her I would one day be reunited with her and bring her tales of a life well lived. A life of joy and happiness, a life of love and of humour, a life of fulfilment and fruition. As a start to fulfilling that life, Di and I have set a challenge each.

First out the blocks is Di, who will leave London on Wednesday 10th September on her bike with the aim of pedalling herself all the way to Paris, a total of 330 miles over 4 days. As a former prop forward, I decided me in Lycra wasn’t a combination anyone needed to see so I have opted for a running challenge instead.

I will leave our new home on Saturday 25th October, and within 24 hours I will run (and walk!) to Eleanor’s grave 80 miles away in Shropshire. Three marathons, back-to-back. Off road. Through the night.

We have chosen the following charities to split proceeds between:

2Wish
2Wish were the first charity on hand to us on the day Eleanor died. They ensured we had a memory box including a clay footprint of Eleanor and a lock of her hair. They provide advice, counselling and ongoing support to Di and I. They provide complementary therapies and also have a cottage in Wales for use by bereaved parents.

Child Bereavement UK
We have been incredibly grateful for the individual and couples support we have received from Child Bereavement UK. Their counselling has helped us navigate the grief and the differing emotions we both go through, and they have been invaluable to us so far. Their helpline is a source of a trained professional to speak to, they also provide support for bereaved children.

St Chads Church, Boningale
This is Eleanor’s final resting place and we were also married there. Reverend Mary Thomas was invaluable to us from the start, the strength, wisdom and love she gave us helped us navigate the turmoil of the early days as well as ensuring Eleanor’s funeral was the most fitting celebration of her life. St Chads is an impeccably maintained church, and we want to help keep it that way for Eleanor, those who rest alongside her and those who worship there.

Midlands Air Ambulance
An air ambulance crew was first on scene the morning Eleanor died. One of the crew stayed downstairs and played with Fiona. We are so grateful that in such circumstances they were able to bring some normality to Fiona and make that day less traumatic for her. The crews sensitivity and professionalism in a harrowing time for them will always be remembered by us.

FCN
The Farm Community network is a voluntary charity that supports families within the farming community. FCN currently does not have a mechanism in place to help bereaved parents, however some money raised for Eleanor’s challenge will be allocated to an FCN Eleanor’s fund to be able to support future farming families by the way of signposting them to professional help as well as providing training to FCN volunteers so they are qualified to help families unfortunate enough to be in our situation.

Please donate as generously as you can, your money will make a genuine difference to families who have to endure one of the worst experiences life can throw at you, as well as help motivate us both to keep our legs moving on our challenges.

Supporting

The Parochial Church Council of The Parish of Boningale
The Parochial Church Council of The Parish of Boningale

Community | GW-PCCPB

26%

St Chad's church is a charming medieval chapel which serves as the parish church for the village of Boningale.

Midlands Air Ambulance Charity
Midlands Air Ambulance Charity

Health | 1143118

12%

Saving lives by saving time, today, tomorrow and in the future.

Child Bereavement UK
Child Bereavement UK

Children | 1040419

25%

We help families to rebuild their lives when a child grieves or when a child dies. We support children and young people (up to the age of 25) when someone important to them has died or is not expected to live, and parents and the wider family when a baby or child of any age dies or is dying.

2wish
2wish

Children | 1168140

25%

When a family loses a child or a young adult the effects are devastating for all who knew and loved them. Our mission is to ensure that all those affected by the sudden and unexpected death of a child or young adult aged 25 or under receive the bereavement support they need and deserve.

The Farming Community Network
The Farming Community Network

Community | 1095919

12%

The Farming Community Network (FCN) is a voluntary organisation and charity that supports farmers, farming families and people in rural communities through difficult times and periods of change. We help to build thriving communities, encourage resilience and help farming people to explore their options.

Updates

Supporters

863

63%

£63,212.40

+ £13,735.63 Gift Aid

£100,000 target | 863 supporters

Charities Supporting

The Parochial Church Council of The Parish of Boningale
26%
Midlands Air Ambulance Charity
12%
Child Bereavement UK
25%
2wish
25%
The Farming Community Network
12%